Broken Vows and Commitments

Student: About 15 years ago, I did the lamrim course at Kopan Monastery and took some lay vows from you. A couple of years after that, I decided that these lay vows were not the right thing for me and I asked you to take them back. At the time you refused and told me to try harder, and that if I still wanted to give them back later, then you would accept. I have tried this for 15 years and I really think they are not the right thing for me. Rules just make me more neurotic. I can make better decisions by focusing on motivation and the characteristics of the situation rather than trying to blindly follow a set of rules. I know these vows work for your students, but that is not my path. Please take these vows back, I really don't want them.

Rinpoche's Response

My dear Michael,
It’s unbelievable that you tried this long to keep the vows. This means you are a very good student. You tried very seriously and I highly appreciate that, thank you. I should take you to the moon for a vacation in appreciation of the effort you made.

I understand what you are saying. Of course, looking for the highest happiness, long-lasting happiness, is looking for the happiness of every sentient being. The best life is living with the thought to benefit others, then you have a good future.

Thank you very much. Goodbye.

Lama Zopa

PS. Whether I have put you in prison or not depends on your understanding of Dharma. It depends mainly on your motivation. Having a samsaric motivation, seeking happiness for this life and then taking the vows may not even be virtue.

My dear James,
Thank you very much for your kind letter. First of all, the Buddhist teaching is unmistaken, not misleading, because of Buddha’s omniscient mind and compassion for all living beings. Therefore, I normally think, even if you don’t understand the subjects, Dharma texts, and prayers, it is still extremely worthwhile to read or recite them because it leaves positive imprints. When you read mindfully, sooner or later you will be able to understand the meaning, not only intellectually. Each realization of the path is contained in the sadhanas and ceases delusions and karma, liberates us from all the sufferings of samsara and their causes, and ceases defilements, even subtle defilements. As long as the Buddha’s teachings are correctly translated, by reading or reciting them you can achieve advantages like the limitless sky. These explanations include reciting prayers even if you don’t feel them in your heart. As long as it is done mindfully, it always leaves positive effects now and especially in the future. Just hearing the Dharma’s words enables you to receive a good rebirth in your next life and to achieve enlightenment.

For example, the Indian pandit Vasubandhu recited the Abhidharma every day, and there was a pigeon living on the roof who heard his recitations every day. After the pigeon died it was reincarnated into a family in the same area. The Indian pandit went to the family and asked for the child to become a monk. Later, the monk became Lodro Tenpa [Lobpon Loden, Skt: Sthiramati] and wrote five commentaries on the Abhidharma, the text he had heard when he was a pigeon. There are many stories like this. You should understand that you also receive the same benefit.

People read so many books, novels, and stories about things that haven’t happened, that are made up, and also things that have happened, which are all mundane stories about life. So many billions of people read these books in the car or airplane, for the whole day. Reading books which cause anger or attachment means there is no positive imprint. The books people read their whole life only increase negative imprints, either to develop delusion, attachment, and anger, or to build wrong concepts and more delusions.

The buddhas not only taught the path to enlightenment but the quickest way—the tantric sadhanas and so forth, the most secret, sophisticated and skilled path—and you are saying you don’t want to read these sadhanas. For sure, you don’t do sadhanas 24 hours a day, or for four hours, or I doubt for even one hour a day. This is completely cheating yourself and you quickly lose enlightenment. If you compare with all the billions of people wasting their life doing meaningless reading, you will see how you are so fortunate compared to other times, past and present. Just to read sadhanas mindfully is an unbelievably precious thing to do in life.

If you have many sadhanas, the general advice is you make your main meditation whichever is your main deity. You can do the other sadhanas fast. The most important thing is to meditate on the dharmakaya, then a little on the sambhogakaya and nirmanakaya. If you have many sadhanas to do, the rest of the sadhana you can do quickly.

The great enlightened being Pabongka Rinpoche said, “Even if you don’t meditate on the meaning of the sadhanas, you are still reciting. But if you stop doing the sadhanas it is so very unfortunate. You don’t even get the good fortune from just reading or thinking of the words, which leads to positive imprints.”

With much love and prayer...

PS. If you think it is dogma having to do many of these practices, is it also dogma that after you eat food you have to go to the toilet? Is it dogma that when you get sick you have to go to the hospital? The definition is: if you are suffering, then you have to practice Dharma. There is no other way to gain enlightenment for sentient beings. There are so many means to practice and so many realizations to achieve.

My very dear one,
How are you? I’m sorry I did not have time to speak to you in Germany. I understand very well your problem. Your problem is my problem too. It is very true. When I do pujas with other people, and they go very fast, it does not give a chance to meditate, and I don't want it to become just words. This is why I have difficulties doing pujas with others. But on the other hand, even if you are able to just recite the words, it is very good because it leaves positive imprints and it has only positive effects. It leaves positive imprints to realize the two truths, which is the basis of Buddhism, and to realize the path of Buddhism—method and wisdom. It also leaves the imprints to realize the qualities of the buddhas, which is the goal of Buddhism—to do perfect work for sentient beings. To achieve the rupakaya and the dharmakaya for sentient beings is the goal. There is still a huge difference between just reciting the words and watching TV or reading novels. Most of the time when they are not working, people spend their lives in activities that just cause attachment, anger, and ignorance to arise. Reading Dharma books and Buddha's teachings has a different effect. It is only positive. It pacifies anger, attachment, and ignorance.

One method is to do the longer version and more meditation on your main deity and do the short version of the other commitments, just the essence. The essential meditation in the sadhanas is the dharmakaya, sambhogakaya, and nirmanakaya meditation; the rest you can do quickly. This is according to Tsenshap Serkong Rinpoche. Even if you have stopped doing your commitments you can try to do them again.

If you are busy and want to abandon your commitments mentally, this is the most disrespectful. If you are busy and have the wish to do them but are unable to do so, this is lighter. Try to do whatever you can. To abandon them could create the cause to be unable to practice in the future. But if you are busy working for others and you miss your commitments due to that, there is no need to regret much. If you miss doing them because of laziness, then there is a loss; this is more your fault. This is what His Holiness the Dalai Lama used to say when I consulted him on this matter. Don't worry, and try again. The most important thing is to live life with bodhicitta, which becomes work for others.

With much love and prayer...

Dear Karen,
I am surprised you want to give back your Yamantaka commitments. You should know that many Westerners do manage to practice. Your view is just the way you think. If you cannot practice, this means you are not even leaving positive imprints on your mind, which is the quickest path to be free from samsara and to reach enlightenment.

Regarding your question about the house, if you can, it would be best to buy it, and sell it when you can get a good profit, otherwise just rent it.

Dear Lama Zopa Rinpoche,
I had taken initiations from you for Cittamani Tara, Chenrezig (I am not sure) and Vajrayogini and Heruka initiations (I am not sure either). I confess that I have not been doing the sadhanas for these deities. I wish to confess my ignorance and atone for my sins. Please advise me on what to do. I am also not sure whether I took these initiations during the 1980s. I had already done 42 recitations of the Noble Sanghata Darma Paryaya Sutra and performed 36 Tara pujas at the center.

I have not abandoned the Dharma and I hope to practice even harder. I attended the first Tara puja as recommended by you, for the Maitreya Project, and the attendance was very good. I also am looking for a new job. Can you please help me dear Lama? Thank you for your compassion.

Yours in the Triple Gem,
Gordon

Rinpoche's Response 

My very dear Gordon,
Thank you very much for your kind letter. I highly appreciate very much your care and concern that you didn’t do all the recitations and commitments, and that you didn’t complete the number of mantras and sadhanas.

I checked what you can do to purify this. On the special tsog days (Tibetan 25th and 10th) if you can, recite:

• Four malas of Vajrayogini tsog (you can do the long one three times and the short one once)
• Four malas of Heruka tsog
• One mala of Cittamani Tara tsog

Regarding how to do this, please ask the geshe at your center to explain. If you have done the retreat of any of these deities, then the best thing, of course, is to do self-initiation, but I don’t think you have done the retreats.

Anyway, continue to do the practice again, start from now. Each day you do the practice it leaves positive imprints on the mind. Even if you recite the words and your mind is totally distracted, it still leaves imprints on the mind, and sooner or later you will have attainments on the path. Of course, it is best not to be distracted.

Doing these practices every day eliminates your defilements and helps you to achieve enlightenment, so that you can liberate numberless sentient beings from the oceans of samsaric suffering and bring them to enlightenment.

The most important thing is lamrim. Each day do a little meditation on the lamrim and live your life with a bodhicitta motivation, with a good heart. You should practice the same as what we teach in Essential Education. Practice:

• Kindness
• Tolerance
• Rejoicing
• Forgiveness

Forgiveness means if someone has harmed you, forgive the person, and if you have harmed someone, then you should apologize.

So, every day, practice these points. This stops negative karma and protects you from the suffering of the lower realms and in the future for hundreds of thousands of lifetimes, including suffering in the future in the human realm. This is the result from that one negative karma, until it is purified. You experience the result in the human realm, suffering unceasingly, without end, also in the lower realms, until that karma is purified.

Practicing these four things also protects you from causing others to create negative karma, to get angry and so forth. It protects others from being born in the lower realms, so they do not have to experience the sufferings of the lower realms, protects them from negative karma, and from having to experience suffering in the future, unceasingly, without end, until from their side they purify that negative karma.

So, you can see how this is the most important practice for sentient beings to engage in. Engaging in these four practices is the most urgent thing. This brings happiness for oneself now and in the future, and happiness to others now and in the future. It also brings happiness, peace, and success in this life. This is the opposite practice to engaging in negative karma. The result of negative karma is what causes all the problems and harm in one’s life; all obstacles come from that.

So, please think about this well, do the practices, and live your life with a good heart, kindness, and bodhicitta.

With much love and prayers...

My very dear Kim,
Thank you very much for your kind letter. I understand what you are saying and my suggestion is for you to please read Pabongka Rinpoche's text Heart-Spoon [now revised and renamed The Heart's Utmost Need], and for you to meditate on the perfect human rebirth, karma, and especially focus on death and impermanence and the sufferings of the lower realms.

After you have gone through all the stages of the lower scope, then again go back and start the meditations again. Go over the lower scope and parts of the lower scope that you did not finish in one day’s meditation, then continue the next day.

I have attached some advice on how to meditate on the lamrim. You should do meditations on the lower scope for at least one year, and then maybe you will have realizations. It is best if you can do the meditations every day in the morning and evenings, whatever you can, continuously. This will help very much.

With much love and prayers ...

P.S. Please make your life most beneficial with the thought of bodhicitta.